33 Comments
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Kiya Taylor's avatar

What an incredibly moving post, Sarina. Thank you for sharing it with us. I wish your family gentle love and healing in this time of goodbyes for now. Xx

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Thank you for your kind words Kiya, they mean a lot 🙏🏽💜

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Serena Camacho's avatar

This line will stick with me for a while: “… the muse was more powerful than her sense of unworthiness.”

Your beautiful words have brought tears to my eyes. I’m sorry you lost your stepmum but so happy for both of you that you got to say what’s most needed.

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Thank you Serena, me too.

And yes, the muse is mightier 💜

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Serena Camacho's avatar

It is for sure. Thank goodness!

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Rick Lewis's avatar

This same expression stood out to me as profound and universally true—that the muse, purpose, perhaps true love—all dissolve our self doubt.

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Claire Venus ✨'s avatar

Stunning. Thank you for sharing your heart. 💞 🥹 ✨

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Thank you Claire 💜💜

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Rachel Zinman Yoga's avatar

This was a beautiful tribute and read. My step mum just passed and she was my best friend for my whole life...I was there at the end and it was the biggest gift to feel how close we were even though it wasn't by blood...reading this touched me deeply. Thank you

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Oh wow; how beautiful to have had a best friend in your stepmum, I’m so sorry to hear she passed too. How blessed we have been. Thank you so much for reading x

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Jocelyn Lovelle's avatar

Oh Sarina. I am so happy and my heart is so filled for you that you made this happen for yourself and for B. What a divine bit of time in your human selves together. I love every bit of this. Especially this, "This is what it felt like, to surrender to each other’s love." That got me. And this, "My sister was offering me my place." So much love and tenderness and beauty in these moments. Thank you for sharing this delicate and gorgeous experience with us. ❤️❤️❤️

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Thank you dear Jocelyn, thank you for these reflections and for your love. Appreciate you ♥️

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Gayle Beavil 🇨🇦's avatar

Sarina, I loved this so much. I lost my mom just two years ago and the bedside time you shared with your "second mom" reminded me of the beauty in my mom's and my final days. Her last few days were some of the most beautiful days we spent together. I think you likely get what I mean. Thank you for this post and for sharing this precious relationship with us. What an amazing, thoughtful, talented and generous woman she was.

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Hi Gayle, yes I do get what you mean. How devastating that you lost your mama, there really is so much beauty as well as pain in grief.

Thank you for all of these reflections . 💜♥️

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Ray Katharine Cohen's avatar

Just crying onto my keyboard and wanting to thank you for sharing this. It is an example that I hope I will have the privilege to follow. Wrapping you all in love

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Thank you Ray 💜💜

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Rick Lewis's avatar

The tilt of the bird's head . . . The quality of your writing stands on the precision of your noticing and the capacity to select just the right details to send a sublime mood half way around the world. Thank you for this tender tribute that I'm certain will assist me to meet my own death, or the departure of a loved one with more courage and joy.

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Thank you for such a thoughtful and generous comment Rick. It’s an honour to hear this could offer anything of assistance around death 🤍

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Lauren Barber's avatar

Oh Sarina, this is so heart achingly moving. What a tender time and for you to share feels like such an honour. Holding you all in this time. Xxx

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Thank you Lauren, I appreciate you 🙏🏽♥️

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Sage Justice's avatar

😭😭😭just read again. ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

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Sage Justice's avatar

You’ve been on my mind and in my heart. Now I know why. 🫂

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Thank you so much Sage, I so appreciate your support ♥️♥️♥️

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Antonia Taylor's avatar

Sarina, this was so moving and what a gift to articulate this complex relationship. Thank you so much for sharing. The poet Ada Limon writes about her stepmother with so much - this reminded me of that xo

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Thank you Antonia. I hadn’t heard of her, will check it out thanks so much ♥️

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Antonia Taylor's avatar

Just DM’d it x

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Louise Morris's avatar

My eyes and heart are overflowing with tears and love, all intermingled, as they should be. May these precious memories warm your soul as you honour your second mum’s life and irrevocable place in yours. And thank you for so generously sharing them with us, so that we may know a little of B, too 🩷

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Your words are so beautiful and mean a lot, thank you Louise. They will warm my heart indeed, so grateful ♥️

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Louise Morris's avatar

You’re so welcome. I’m thinking of you and all your family x

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Danielle Levin Roberts's avatar

Sarina, your piece was so moving it brought me to tears. My stepmom is 80 and has been in my life 51 years. As with yours, our love has always been cautious. I tried calling her “mom” at times but it was awkward and actually upset my “real” mother. Yet my stepmom has always been a second mom and she did her best. My dad denied her the chance of having her own children.

Someday, like you, I’ll be at her bedside saying my goodbyes. I only hope I get the chance for us to have the same loving closure you’ve had with B. Thank you so much for your beautiful story.

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Wow Danielle, thank you for sharing a snippet of your own story. That’s a long time to have a second mum ♥️

That’s sad to hear she didn’t get to have her own children, if she wanted them. You must be so precious to her.

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Carmen Luisa's avatar

Wow what a special piece! ❤️ Sitting here with tears rolling down my face. With both parents having new partners, I know this situation will come too at some point. Having already said good bye to one “real” parent, I know this season of grief and growth isn’t easy. But there’s also so much healing in moments like the ones you described. Sending you lots of love Sarina! 🌸

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Sarina Zoe's avatar

Thank you Carmen, so sorry to hear you already lost a parent.

Yes there really is so much healing, we have to take all the healing words and gestures we can get. X

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